Saturday, October 3, 2020

Blessed Assurance

 "This is my story, this is my song ..." Ah! I have heard this hymn all during my childhood and as I age I fully embrace the lyrics more and more. Some people go a lifetime not realizing their purpose but for me, I know my purpose is storytelling, yet I rarely walk in it and I honestly don't give it the priority that it needs. Earlier this week, a friend of mine, with whom I nearly do daily routine silly exchanges on Microsoft Teams, challenged me to get back to doing things that empower me that is not work-related. I wanted to reach through my PC and slap Belen but I knew she was right. It's funny how the Creator dispatches his angels to bring you back full circle to the very thing that you so passionately run from. Truth is, I have so much to say but I'm tired. I'm tired of trying to share with others who are so rigid that they can't see a different point of view that differs from their own. It's becoming evident that we are living in a bubble. A safe bubble where nothing really matters besides our wants and needs. We have lost our sense of community; hell, I've lost my sense of community! There is a part of my story that leans towards my culture and heritage. Right now, the news media has a no holds barred approach when displaying acts of brutality against people of color that causes discomfort and reinforces past violence. It causes discomfort in my day to day life and my work life as well. I don't work with people who predominately look like me nor understand the history of people who look like me. So basically, it's business as usual. My mental health has been battered and bruised during the era of COVID.  I find myself being pulled and prodded in so many different directions to a point where its unhealthy and has increased my anxiety. So much so that I have retreated to the safety of my own home. The only person I allow in my bubble has been Chris (my boo). Even though I have a heightened sense of uneasiness,  I also am confronted with the real issue...walking in purpose; storytelling.

I hear the universe loud and clear and I'm officially opening my prayers and life to walking into it. Blessed assurance, Jesus is mine!